Jill Cohen
Mediation seeks to enable decision-making and heal misunderstandings.

What is mediation?

Mediation is a legal option for resolving conflict without going to court. A neutral mediator guides the participants to discuss and negotiate their dispute directly, rather than through attorneys, and does not impose any decisions, as would a judge or arbitrator.

What types of conflicts are appropriate for mediation?

Mediation can be beneficial for a wide range of conflicts, particularly conflicts where the parties have a family or interpersonal relationship that could benefit from a non-adversarial approach that seeks to enable decision-making, heal misunderstandings and preserve relationships.  Examples include divorce, co-habitation agreements, separation of unmarried couples, post-divorce conflicts, neighbor disputes, family business matters, and estate settlements.

How does divorce mediation work?

Couples meet with the mediator in a private, non-adversarial setting. All work together to identify the decisions that need to be made regarding asset division, parenting and support. The mediator then helps the couple develop a deeper understanding of their needs, and identify creative solutions that are best for each of them and their children. At the conclusion of the mediation sessions, a written agreement is drafted reflecting the negotiated settlement. This agreement can be used as the basis for filing the divorce papers.

What are the benefits of mediation?

The mediator guides the couple to negotiate productively and respectfully during what is often a difficult emotional time. By keeping the discussions focused on each party’s needs and interests and planning for the future, the mediator can uncover common ground for agreement. Mediation helps to minimize the financial and emotional strain that can accompany divorce and other family conflicts by allowing the parties to control the timing, costs and outcome of their dispute.

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Is mediation a better alternative than the courtroom?

Mediation is a good choice if both spouses want to avoid the contentious and costly nature of the traditional adversarial process.  Participants are more often satisfied with the process and outcome of a mediated, rather than a litigated, settlement.

When is divorce mediation not appropriate?

In divorce mediation, each party must feel safe sitting in the mediation room with their spouse and be willing and able to assert their own views.  In situations where there is a history of domestic violence, the abused spouse may fear that asserting his or herself in mediation will have violent consequences.  Divorce mediation is generally not appropriate in this situation.

Is a lawyer necessary for mediation?

While mediation does not necessarily eliminate the need for an individual attorney, it does change the lawyer’s role from one of negotiator to consultant, which generally requires fewer hours of a lawyer’s time, saving time and money.

How much does it cost to mediate a divorce?

The cost of a mediated divorce varies depending on the complexity of the family’s situation, but it is a fraction of the cost of a litigated divorce. 

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